Tonight I had an interesting discussion with a friend over Indian food. We were talking about people who go to foreign countries and become so shocked and disoriented from the foreign ambiance and culture, that they become temporarily insane.
So I wondered,what is it that hurts us so when what we idealize turns out to be less then what we had imagined? What leads us to that terrible suffering that can be devastating and traumatic?
Think about it, we do it all the time in so many areas of our lives...a new romantic partner, a new job, a vacation somewhere exotic, an older person in our family, our children, etc. We imagine that person or place or thing to be all of our hopes and dreams. And then, when something goes terribly wrong and resembles our worst nightmare instead...we are shattered, broken by the experience. Why?
Hmmm...what is it that causes this pain? This is what I want to get to the bottom of. I don't think it's wrong to have expectations and it's certainly healthy to have hopes and dreams...so why all this suffering as a result???
As far as I can dig, I think it all comes down to energy. Maybe our dreams and desires give birth to a particular vibration. This vibration begins to buzz and come alive the more we think about and focus on what we are hoping for. Then, in our rational minds, we fixate on one object and attach that given person/place/thing to our hopes and desires...making them synonymous in our minds. We no longer focus on our desire, as much as we focus on what we have identified as the container of that desire. And so, when that container gives a confusing combination of pieces and parts of our desires, along with an array of behavior and/or circumstances that are the exact opposite of what we desire, we become completely shocked, pained, disoriented, insane. "How could this happen...?", "It was going so well...", "Why is this happening to me...?" We have all heard ourselves ask these questions at certain moments in our lives.
Here's what I'm onto...maybe at the point that those questions arrive, or even at the point when our negative feelings begin to surface, maybe that's a signal that we are focused on the container and not on the very thing...the energy actually, of what we WANT. As a metaphor of what I'm trying to say, here's a go at it: Picture the vast ocean. Then, picture a pitcher of water. The pitcher can only hold so much water, right? At times it's full, at times it's half-way full and at times it can even be empty...void of water. So, if we want to go for a swim, or be carried by waves...would we do well to focus on the pitcher? The pitcher might offer us refreshment from time to time, when it happens to be full, or even partly full. But when it's empty, or drained of it's contents...what can we ask of it? Nothing. The more we shout at it, beg it, cry to it, plead with it, threaten it, ignore it...the less we have, including our own energy!
Why not stay focused on the ocean? Well, we can't literally drink from it, but we can dive into it and it will carry us. It will also pummel us, if we are not cautious...but it is infinitely there for our participation. There for us. And full of life and nourishment and friendship.
Perhaps we need to remember that everything is energy. If what we imagined to be the container of our dreams and what we most want turns out to be anything less than a huge benefit to us and our energy...perhaps we are straying from the Source. Perhaps we need to close our eyes, tune in and follow the vibrational energy of our vision, regardless of who or what it strays us away from...just a thought.
Let me know yours!
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